[House] San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion forum digest - 7/17/2012
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Tue Jul 17 02:16:07 PDT 2012
San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion 7/16/2012
9:15 am - 7/17/2012
1. Best Nursing Chair (robynroberts1128)
2. Comment: Best Nursing Chair (HollyBuchanan)
3. Comment: Best Nursing Chair (erin_loback)
4. Crib Sharing? (robynroberts1128)
5. Re: [sfpom_general] Crib Sharing? (mcharap)
6. Comment: Crib Sharing? (erin_loback)
7. Spacing out feelings (anazamost)
8. Comment: Spacing out feelings (mamapod)
9. Comment: Spacing out feelings (erin_loback)
10. CANCELED: Common Childhood Illnesses and Issues (twinpeakstwins)
11. Short term rental desperately needed (marckuzak276)
12. Comment: Bonding with two babies (carogamse)
13. Comment: Bonding with two babies (RachelHK)
14. Re:Bonding with two babies (hashagen5)
15. Comment: Bonding with two babies (daisymay94596)
16. Re:Bonding with two babies (BlacksherTwins)
17. Comment: Bonding with two babies (MamaWobin)
18. Re:Disneyland (hashagen5)
19. Comment: Looking for a pediatrican at or close to CPMC (elyich)
1. Best Nursing Chair
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robynroberts1128 - 7/16/2012 1:49 pm
What do you recommend as far as chairs go for tandem
nursing? I just bought the "my brest friend twins
pillow" and it doesn't seem to fit in any nursing
glider - is there any glider that is good for tandem
nursing or is it best to forgo the glider?
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Email author: robynroberts1128 at gmail.com
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2. HollyBuchanan says...
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7/16/2012 2:13 pm
I had two different gliders, and neither worked for
tandem feeds. The couch or your bed, the double
nursing pillow, and a bunch of additional pillows was
the only way I could make it work. Also, regular
tandem feeds don't work for everyone. When our babies
came out of the NICU they were on a schedule 30 minutes
apart (one fed at 9, the next at 9:30, etc.) so we did
single feeds at first. Also, one quickly preferred the
bottle, so I would breast feed one and bottle feed the
other which you do not need a tandem pillow for.
Lastly, the tandem pillow seems to get smaller and
smaller once your babies start growing more and more! I
remember when I was pregnant I was somewhat consumed
with how to feed them at the same time, and once they
arrived I realized tandem BF'ing wasn't the best route
for us. Before long, both preferred the bottle so I
would pump and double bottle feed by sitting on the
couch with one baby on either side of me. Good luck!
Email author: h.buch at hotmail.com
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3. erin_loback says...
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7/16/2012 8:22 pm
I used the tandem pillow until 15.5 months, somehow we
made it work even with bigger babies. But never in a
glider or chair. We used the couch (and ottoman) for
about 5 months (once I was worried they could fall
off), then I moved to the floor on a backjack floor
chair with the nursing pillow.Pottery Barn makes a
chair and a half glider that you probably could tandem
nurse in, but honestly, even when you are a pro at it,
I can't imagine adding gliding into the whole
production that is nursing two babies at once. :-)
Email author: erin_loback at yahoo.com
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4. Crib Sharing?
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robynroberts1128 - 7/16/2012 1:06 pm
Our twins (fraternal) are due in October and we are
looking to buy some furniture right now. Is it best for
twins to share a crib in the beginning or should they
be separated in their own cribs from the start? What
are the pros/cons to each? I keep hearing both and
we're not sure what to do.....thanks in advance for the
help!
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Email author: robynroberts1128 at gmail.com
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5. mcharap says...
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7/16/2012 1:21 pm
Our kids slept in the same crib for 4 mos & I can't
imagine having it any other way. They used to snuggle
up next to each other while sleeping. Clearly they
needed the feel & smell of the other nearby. Congrats &
best of luck.MarcySent from my iPhoneOn Jul 16, 2012,
at 1:07 PM, Robyn Roberts wrote: Robyn Roberts posted:
Our twins (fraternal) are due in October and we are
looking to buy some furniture right now. Is it best for
twins to share a crib in the beginning or should they
be separated in their own cribs from the start? What
are the pros/cons to each? I keep hearing both and
we're not sure what to do.....thanks in advance for the
help! Add your comments online:
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they are used to
being close from the womb; it is SO CUTE; it is
convenient. Cons: I can't think of any while they are
still young. I have heard that you should separate
them before they really realize it, so it isn't an
issue. I cried the night we first put them in separate
cribs, they did not notice at all. I know some people
have had success keeping them in the same crib even
longer, but usually past 4 months or so you need a crib
divider so they each have their own space.
Email author: erin_loback at yahoo.com
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7. Spacing out feelings
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anazamost - 7/16/2012 9:57 am
I have twin identical girls that are 14 weeks old but
were born six weeks early. Everyone tells me that I
should be starting to space out their feedings - that
they can and should go at least three hours between
eating - which I'm fine with. The problem I'm running
into is that when they're both awake and crying and I'm
by myself, the only way I've found to calm them down is
to feed them! Anyone run into this and have a trouble
shooting tip? We're really struggling to start getting
them on a schedule, but then I wonder if 8 weeks
corrected age is too early for that anyway. Not sure if
feeding them on demand still is the helpful or harmful.
Would love your input.
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Email author: anazamost at gmail.com
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8. mamapod says...
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7/16/2012 10:07 am
we used pacifiers in the beginning. That usually did
the trick. Sorry to sound so lame if you have already
tried that.
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9. erin_loback says...
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7/16/2012 10:07 pm
There are definitely people on both sides of this issue
(schedule vs. totally on demand), so here's my two
cents from the scheduling point of view. We had our
babies on a schedule from the minute they came home
from the hospital (they were born at 38 weeks, but were
always on the very small side -- not on the growth
charts until about 9 months for my daughter and 18
months for my son). At that age, your babies are
definitely capable of going a bit longer between
feedings (especially at night). But it's hard to get
them to do that when they are used to being able to eat
whenever they want, because they are likely just
snacking all day long. If you can get them accustomed
to full feedings with no snacking in between, they will
be able to stretch it out a bit longer between
feedings. I concur on the pacifiers, they were
lifesavers for us. Maybe try a 2.5 hour schedule for a
day or so, and use the pacifier to help them stretch it
out between feedings. After a few days, they should get
used to eating a little bit more when you feed them, so
they can fill themselves up so they won't be hungry
until it's next time to eat. Once that is going well,
try three hours. Hopefully you'll find that once they
are getting lots of full feedings during the day, they
can sleep for longer stretches of time at night because
they won't wake themselves up hungry.It is SO HARD when
they are both awake and crying and you are by yourself.
Feeding them (especially if it works!) is definitely
the easiest answer for short-term relief. However, if
you want long-term relief, hopefully if you give it a
few days, you can get a good day schedule going that
ends up improving your nights, too. Pacifiers, walks,
swings -- try anything you can to stretch it out until
they get used to it.All babies are different, but at 2
months my daughter weighed 8.5 pounds and my son was
close to nine, and we were on a 2.5 hour schedule
during the day (we had been doing 3, but my son was
getting extra fussy so we switched to 2.5 for a few
weeks then back to 3), and they were getting a good
6-hour stretch at night (my daughter definitely could
have gone longer, we had to wake her up when my son
woke up hungry because I wanted to always feed them at
the same time). And I know of a lot of other people
who had similar feeding schedules at that age -- it's
not too early. Good luck and hang in there!!ErinBrett
and Maggie 9/28/09
Email author: erin_loback at yahoo.com
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10. CANCELED: Common Childhood Illnesses and Issues
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twinpeakstwins - 7/16/2012 9:44 am
There was not enough interest so this event has been
cancelled.Presented by Nurse Judy at Noe Valley
PeadiatricsThis class gives guidelines that will help
us know how worried to be about various illnesses. We
will discuss fevers, rashes, coughs and colds, tummy
bugs, and common viral syndromes like hand foot mouth.A
great class for new and expecting parents.Event Details
& RSVP---------------------- What: Common Childhood
Illnesses and Issues Who: San Francisco Parents of
Multiples When: Wed Jul 18, 2012, 6:30-8:30 pm PDT
Where: Noe Valley Pediatrics 3700 24th Street
RSVP:
http://www.bigtent.com/home/calendar/event/69428157?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
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With subject line: "Ref#70569814 - CANCELED: Common Childhood
Illnesses and Issues"
Email author: twinpeakstwins at yahoo.com
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11. Short term rental desperately needed
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marckuzak276 - 7/16/2012 6:54 am
Hi,We're moving to San Francisco from the UK in 4
weeks. The flat we were going to rent for the first few
months has just fallen through and we're now quite
desperately trying to find an alternative. We need
somewhere to stay with our three year old twin boys for
the first 2-3 months while while we look for somewhere
longer term to rent, ideally in Noe Valley but we're
pretty flexible. We're looking on Craig's list every
day but I thought it would be worth posting on here in
case there's another site we should be looking at or if
anyone knew of anyone who's about to rent their place
out. If anyone knows of anything then please let me
know...many thanks, Gabie.
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With subject line: "Ref#70564211 - Short term rental desperately
needed"
Email author: gabriellekuzak at googlemail.com
--------------------------------------------------------
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Topic: Bonding with two babies
Hi moms-- I am currently reading "Mothering Multiples"-- I
guess I am cramming before...
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With subject line: "Ref#70544196 - Bonding with two babies"
12. carogamse says...
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7/16/2012 7:36 am
I think you need to throw that book away. What good is
it doing for you? Since I don't have a singleton, I
can't attest to the difference, but the fact is, you
will love your children deeply, completely,
unconditionally, unbelievably. I had a HUGE problem
with singleton envy for the first 9 months, and
clinging on to my expectations of motherhood was my
largest obstacle to overcome. Bonding may be
different, but OF COURSE it will happen. The hardest
emotional difference with having twins, early on, is
that you will simply feel like you can't take care of
them the way you want to. When they both cry, you
can't tend to both of them directly. You can't feed
them exactly when and how you will want to (i.e.,
holding it, feeding it, and giving it your exclusive
attention). This sadness and guilt really brought me
down, but you just HAVE TO get over it. Realize that
you are doing everything you can for your children, and
loving them, talking to them, holding them is all they
need. I couldn't stop thinking "this just isn't fair",
but that is a useless thought. The biggest thing that
will make you feel like you're missing out on something
is your "expectation" of what it should all be like.
Let this go, accept that you will have twins. While the
early days were hard hard hard, I think the babies are
no worse off, and in fact, may be better off because
while I couldn't be their constant companion, they had
each other! They now not only love their father and
me, but each other. They play, laugh, and bond with
each other constantly. My twins are now 12 months, and
they are extremely happy, social, loving things. Good
luck and remember that every phase is temporary!
Email author: caro.agrawal at gmail.com
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13. RachelHK says...
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7/16/2012 8:24 am
Put that book in a drawer and GO TO SLEEP! DOnt go
too crazy on the book reading. Use yoru baby books as
a reference tool (along with your Dr.) when you have a
question or when something doesnt seem right. FWIW
my first babies were twins, and, having nothing to
compare that parenting experience to, I can tell you
that I had no trouble bonding with my children -
equally, in fact. My babies are fraternal and could
not be more different in terms of looks and
personality. But i adore each of them to my very core
(they are now almost 2). I agree with the above poster
that it took a few months to fully sink in that THESE
ARE MY BABIES. The shock of going from the life of a
carefree adult to the mother of an instant family is a
lot to absorb. But i do not agree that one person
cannot love two babies at the same time. Nonsense. i
now feel SORRY for singleton moms who have less fun and
love to go around than we twin moms do. For example,
there is always one baby who wants to cuddle, even when
the other one is being fussy. Or one baby who wants to
play silly games when the other baby doesnt. Yes,
twins are incredibly daunting in those early months,
but it all settles down soon enough. All in all, my
twins make me feel rich and lucky. Good luck welcoming
your new babies!
Email author: rmherrick at yahoo.com
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14. hashagen5 says...
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7/16/2012 8:27 am
I think the single biggest piece of advice I would give
to new multiple families is to make a point of spending
one-on-one time with each of your children, from as
early as you can manage. It's hard at first, but so
worth it. You will love your children enormously, but
time with just one will let you ENJOY your babies more.
In the early days it could be feeding just one, while
someone else feeds the other in a different location.
Usually when you have extra hands and newborns you want
to be as efficient as possible, but use some help for
"solo" time. As the year progresses, it can be each
parent taking one child for errands or a walk -- it's
easier than two and you will receive far less attention
in public. As your children grow, both parents and
children will cherish what was called "private time" in
our house. My girls are 14 and we all still need/want
it. Sent from my iPad
Email author: hashagen5 at aol.com
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15. daisymay94596 says...
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7/16/2012 9:32 am
As a first time mom, I had very similar concerns! As
pp said, dump the book... You will bond with each
child differently and you will love them to pieces
equally. I was instantly in love with my 2 but bonding
did take a bit longer. Right now, just enjoy the sleep
and make the final last minute preparation for you 2
bundles of joy!
Email author: daisymay94596 at yahoo.com
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16. BlacksherTwins says...
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7/16/2012 1:35 pm
Do yourself a favor and toss that book in the trash!!
Do some deep breathing and relax to prepare for your C
and following healing!! With THAT said :) I found
bonding with my twins to occur naturally and
immediately . . . They are individuals and have
different needs ) Good luck and congratulations!
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Topic: Disneyland
A friend and I and my 14 year old daughters went to
Disneyland and California Adventure...
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18. hashagen5 says...
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7/16/2012 8:21 am
Sharon Ohlson mentioned the monorail, which is close to
the Disneyland Hotel, also the midnight closing. Both
are true, and helpful for getting the most out of the
day. Two provisos however -- we were told that the
monorail stops running one half hour before the park
closes, don't cut it too close, we found out the hard
way and then had a longer walk back. Also check with
hotel or park staff about closing time -- while usual
hours are midnight in the summer, Disneyland closed at
11 one night of our visit, and it wasn't disclosed at
the entrance. The next week a friend went and had the
same experience. Sent from my iPad
Email author: hashagen5 at aol.com
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Topic: Looking for a pediatrican at or close to CPMC
I'm expecting twins in a few months and currently looking
for a pediatrician, ideally...
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close to CPMC"
19. elyich says...
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7/16/2012 3:29 pm
Dr. Noah Simons is right around there. Very efficient
practice!
Email author: elyich at yahoo.com
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