[House] San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion forum digest - 6/9/2013
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Sun Jun 9 02:15:06 PDT 2013
San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion 6/8/2013
9:14 am - 6/9/2013
1. 3 Year-old Identical Twins--one eats, the other doesn't
(JessicaNoa)
2. Thank you for a wonderful family outing today! (Sandpiper)
3. Comment: RSVP Reminder: Save The Date! June 8th... (reynolds1)
4. Comment: RSVP Reminder: Save The Date! June 8th... (Sandpiper)
5. Comment: Portable breast pump (atolhurst68)
6. Comment: Housework (atolhurst68)
7. Comment: Housework (JessicaNoa)
8. Comment: Bringing home our preemies...advice for... (atolhurst68)
9. Comment: We have arrived!!! (atolhurst68)
1. 3 Year-old Identical Twins--one eats, the other doesn't
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JessicaNoa - 6/8/2013 10:10 pm
One of my boys (mono/di) always was a bit smaller, but
used to go through phases where he seemed to catch up
to his brother. However, lately, he seems to be eating
less than ever and is now 2 lbs lighter than his
brother at 3 years old. His energy level is ok, but he
isn't growing as fast and he's skinny. This same twin
had surgery at 8 months for a double inguinal hernia,
which is fairly common in preemies. I keep imagining
that maybe something else in there isn't perfectly
connected either and is affecting his digestion, making
him not want to eat. Any thoughts on what might be
causing his low appetite, or how to get him eating
more?Thanks
Send comment to:
With subject line: "Ref#78545392 - 3 Year-old Identical Twins--one
eats, the other doesn't"
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2. Thank you for a wonderful family outing today!
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Sandpiper - 6/8/2013 1:12 pm
We loved getting together with other twin families
today! Cudos to the organizers - great choice of a
playground, entertainment ( the original puppets that
our twins absolutely loved!), food and raffles! I have
some pictures that I can post to our closed Facebook
group unless others mind. I can also upload them to
BigTent , whatever is better.
Send comment to:
With subject line: "Ref#78539938 - Thank you for a wonderful family
outing today!"
Email author: ggmgjenia at gmail.com
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Topic: RSVP Reminder: Save The Date! June 8th Family Outing
Tomorrow!
Try to dropping off a parent, stroller and kids then find
parking. We will...
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With subject line: "Ref#78532446 - RSVP Reminder: Save The Date! June
8th Family Outing"
3. reynolds1 says...
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6/8/2013 7:53 pm
Amazing event! Thank you so much for planning. We had a
fabulous time and are grateful for the efforts put into
this event! Fun venue, awesome people, yummy food and
cool puppet show! James also did an amazing job with
the food and welcoming everyone. :-) Thanks again!!!
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4. Sandpiper says...
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6/8/2013 10:15 pm
This was a wonderful event, so well planned. Here are a
few photos:
http://www.bigtent.com/home/calendar/event/77509117/photos?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
Email author: ggmgjenia at gmail.com
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Topic: Portable breast pump
Hello-
I am planning to rent a hospital grade breast pump while I'm
at home on maternity...
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With subject line: "Ref#78520474 - Portable breast pump"
5. atolhurst68 says...
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6/8/2013 8:18 am
Hi I used the Medela Freestyle pump and found it great.
It is quite expensive but it has great resale value
(well it did in Australia).I bought it for about $550
AUD and sold for $285 AUD. Erin is right in that it has
different attachments to the Symphony and the Instyle
but the double pump with hands free is fantastic. You
don't need a special bra. It has a variety of
attachments that attach to your existing bras or
feeding tops with built in bras. It has a belt that the
motor unit attaches to so you can walk around whilst
you pump. It took me a week or 2 before I had a go at
using the hands free. It looked a bit complicated but
it actually isnt once you have followed the
instructions the first time. It comes with a stylish
Tote bag (I think here in the US you can also get a
model that has a backpack) that makes it quite portable
so you may find that you could just take this one to
and home from work rather than have 2. It also has a
little fridge bag and ice block that fits 4 medela
bottles for storage throughout the day. I found I used
this bag a lot without the pump to take bottles with me
whenever I went out for extended periods. I did use the
Symphony pump initially in hospital when my twins were
in Special Care but then started bringing in the
Freestyle and using that instead. I can't comment on
prices here in US but when I looked at hiring vs
buying, I found it more economical to buy upfront as it
was really quite expensive to hire the hospital grade
pumps (but it might be cheaper here).Hope that was
helpful.CheersAnnette
Email author: atolhurst68 at gmail.com
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Topic: Housework
Is anyone having issues with their partner about division of
houusehold labour?
I'm...
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With subject line: "Ref#78471971 - Housework"
6. atolhurst68 says...
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6/8/2013 8:31 am
Hi There. Reading your post my heart went out to you.
My partner is very understanding about how tough it is
looking after the twins all day and thinks I have the
harder job. So I am trying to think about what happened
that has given him that insight. I think it was because
he was home with me for 5 weeks from when they first
came home from hospital (after 3 weeks in Special
Care). So I think the previous posters suggestion is
the only one that is going to really change his
attitude rather than you having to find ways to meet
his expectations. He has to walk in your shoes for a
bit. Does he ever take over for a day on the weekend
and let you go off (so that he has sole responsibility
for a whole day or weekend???? That might just be
enough to make it sink in. Do you have the opportunity
to mix much with other parents of multiples (so that he
gets to hear how other dads see things). Sometimes you
just can't tell them but they respond to hearing it
from someone else. I hope you find a resolution that
doesn't involve you just working harder and harder to
keep the house tidy. You don't need that added stress
at this time.
Email author: atolhurst68 at gmail.com
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7. JessicaNoa says...
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6/8/2013 2:14 pm
One thing that helps for me is to tell him how it makes
me feel when he behaves that way. I sometimes have to
remind my husband of the impact his resentful behavior
has, especially when I know I'm doing all I can. That
helps, even if he doesn't admit it. Switching roles
for at least a day is a great idea, too.
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Topic: Bringing home our preemies...advice for the first few
days?
Our babies were born 2 weeks ago, at 34 weeks gestation.
They've been in the NICU...
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With subject line: "Ref#78360449 - Bringing home our preemies...advice
for the first few days?"
8. atolhurst68 says...
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6/8/2013 9:28 am
Firstly - Congratulations on the birth of your
babies.All of these posts have given great advice. I
have B/G twins born 34.5 weeks and were in Special Care
for 3 weeks. In Australia we are also told not to
co-sleep babies due to SIDS risks but even in hospital
they slept together in the same crib. THe Nurses and
Drs wont tell you categorically that it is OK to sleep
them together due to fear of legal ramifications if
something did happen. In Australia the SIDS
recommendations is to not co-sleep but it then goes on
to say that there has been no incidence of co-sleeping
twins contributing to SIDS - so I think they all just
go very overboard with recommendations. I co-slept mine
across the crib side by side until they were about 8
weeks old. My main reason for spitting them was
concerns about them waking each other (which was rare
but happened occasionally). I was using the Leander
Cribs which have a solid timber panel top and bottom so
I was able to put them feet to feet and create a little
bit of a sound barrier.We opted to put them in a
separate room from day one. We were told by many other
parents of multiples that they are really noisy when
they sleep and that we might not get any ourselves if
they were in the room with us. We also have a bedroom
that is really close to theirs so we had not issues
hearing them cry if they woke up. I guess this could be
a bit of trial and error for you and see what works.We
really stuck to the feed/sleep schedule that they were
on in the hospital and that really saved us. In some
ways I think we were really lucky that we had that time
in special care (even though we would have loved to
have them home with us) for them to get settled into a
routine and for us to get some training on how to care
for them. It meant that it was much less stressful when
we brought them home. I can't imagine bringing them
home on day 4 or 5 with us and my hat goes off to those
that managed that.Re sleeping flat, I also had been
told about issues with sleeping babies for extended
periods of time in the baby capsules. We have the Baby
Jogger CIty Select and used the basinettes for the
first 3 - 4 months. As previous poster mentioned, this
was great for overnight stays or extended outings. We
could either sleep them in the stroller all night or
detach the basinettes and put them on a guest bed
etc... It also allowed us to seperate them at home if
we needed to without the need for extra furniture (live
in small 2 bedroom apt). The other good thing about
these basinettes is you can completely enclose the
babies (it has a zip up mesh cover attached to canopy)
so you don't have the passersby sticking their heads in
the pram as you walk around. This pram is also an
in-line model so it fits through doors really easily.
We love ours so much we brought it with us from Aus for
our 5 month stay here in US.The other tips I have are:-
start a ritual in regards to sleep times (we always
swaddle babies, say night night and put down awake for
sleeps) they are now 6 months old (unadjusted) and they
go off to sleep really easy (they don't necessarily
stay that way unfortunately).- once they get to about 3
months old and you start to give them more uptime and
variable sleeps, try to keep their longer sleeps in
their cribs and shorter naps can be whilst out walking
in stroller. This way as the smaller naps/sleeps drop
away and they get older they will be used to going to
bed for their afternoon sleep. They don't sleep as well
in the stroller as they get older.- At night time we
did a thing called Feed/Bath/Feed until they were 5
months. at 6.30pm or whatever time you want to commence
"bed time" activities, we give them 1/3 to half their
feed, give them a bath, then the rest of their feed.
This should take 1 hour and so for us in bed at 7.30pm.
We found that they sleep really well after this ritual.
The bath both tires them and calms them at the same
time. It is not really about cleaning but signifying
time for bed. We do this every day which can be tough
but I think with twins you need to be a bit of a slave
to the routines to get you through the first 6 - 12
months.- One last tip is to try to put babies to bed
drowsy but awake so that they learn to self settle.
This can be hard when they are so little but it will
really save you later on and will help build the skills
for them to get through the night later on. I found it
great to join my local Mothers Group (all parents with
single babies) but they don't always understand the
complications we face in achieving what might seem like
simple tasks. They offer lots of suggestions which you
know just won't work. However, they are a great support
and I find that it is usually more practical to meet up
with them as they are more local then the multiples
groups. I learnt not to get too defensive and try to
explain why things won't work but thank them for the
advice. The other thing that is really funny with these
groups is that they don't quite get the routines. They
have the luxury of demand sleeping/feeding and can't
understand when I actually wake my babies from a
morning nap because i run a tight schedule. Most of
them also will have full term babies and it is easy to
get disheartened if you allow yourself to compare the
development of yours to them. Just remember that every
baby is different (even between your own twins) and
develops at various paces.I am staying in San Fran
until early August and more than happy to have a chat
anytime. Message me if you want my number. I possibly
have more time than a lot of other parents here because
I have left my usual busy life behind in Aus for a
while and have the luxury of focussing all my attention
on my babies without the usual distractions of
family/friends etc...CheersAnnette
Email author: atolhurst68 at gmail.com
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Topic: We have arrived!!!
Hi Everyone
I have just moved here (from Sydney Australia) for 5 months
with my 5...
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With subject line: "Ref#78198217 - We have arrived!!!"
9. atolhurst68 says...
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6/8/2013 9:30 am
Hi EveryoneSorry for not getting back to you. I had no
idea that I had these responses (am still getting use
to how the Big Tent notifications work) - just found
them by accident. I will definitely get in touch with
you all soon.CheersAnnette
Email author: atolhurst68 at gmail.com
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