San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion 9/6/2012 9:16 am - 9/7/2012
1. Need some perspective on our nanny situation (anonymous)
2. Multiples-Specific Park Survey needs your input! (nataliasha2004)
3. Comment: Multiples-Specific Park Survey needs your inpu... (Laudan)
4. Seeking Morning Mother's Helper and Evening Mother's... (eeewww)
5. 24-Hour Nurse Available Early October (eeewww)
6. Comment: Tips on Outings with 21-month Old Twins... (sfbamob)
7. Comment: Tips on Outings with 21-month Old Twins... (nataliasha2004)
8. Comment: Night nanny questions (Laudan)
9. Comment: 7 seater cars (molly397)
10. Comment: 7 seater cars (JessicaNoa)
1. Need some perspective on our nanny situation
--------------------------------------------------------
anonymous - 9/6/2012 10:05 pm
We are first time parents, and all of this is so new to
us! So. We hired a nanny about three weeks ago, and
by that time we were a little pressed for time as I was
going back to work soon. I spent the first week with
her at home, and my husband spent a day with her the
second week. My husband and I didn't completely agree
on our priorities, and I kind of won the battle- I
wanted a career nanny who speaks Spanish. However, she
speaks very little English, and though our Spanish is
pretty good, what's lacking in communication is all the
subtle non-verbal stuff. Also, there are some cultural
interferences I think also. For example, my daughter
rolled over for the first time on my first day back at
work (of course), but the nanny didn't tell us this
until the next day when I was home with them and showed
her what the baby learned. Nanny said "oh yes, she did
that yesterday.". A relatively minor issue, sure, so
here are my husband's worries. He felt she bounced the
girls too forcefully to sleep (they are five months
old, and BIG), that she rushed their baths, that she
spent time on the phone while the girls were awake.
Also, when chatting with him she complained the whole
time about her financial and familial situation.
Ideally, I had wanted someone with enough twins
experience that she could help me get them on a better
schedule, and guide me in planning activities with
them. She isn't proactive like that, and I'm not sure
her twins experience is recent, and it wasn't with
infants. So she isn't my ideal, but I'm not sure it's
time to let her go and start over. Lastly, I'm
wondering what developmental daily activities I should
expect her to engage in with them. It seems she spends
their awake play time just having them lay on their
baby gym and talking with them. Now, this is me on the
outside looking in: it's probably mostly what I do
with them every day as well. I'm hoping that we just
need to give her a little direction and things will
smooth out. Thanks for reading, and thanks in advance
for sharing your experiences, advice, and perspective.
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72112627 - Need some perspective on our nanny situation"
--------------------------------------------------------
2. Multiples-Specific Park Survey needs your input!
--------------------------------------------------------
nataliasha2004 - 9/6/2012 5:33 pm
We need an updated, comprehensive, and
multiples-specific playground/park listing! The Golden
Gate Mother's Group put together a good one a few years
back, that's an excellent start, but we need to add a
layer that addresses our unique concerns, and parents
of multiples.... e.g., is it completely enclosed? How
many gates are there? Are swings close enough together
that one parent/caregiver can push 2 (or more) kiddos
at a time? Are restrooms feasible for multiples? Are
there features that definitely work well for
twins/triplets? etc.Please let me know if you're
interested in helping with this project, either in
overseeing & compiling the data collected, or simply in
providing your feedback based on YOUR local
playgrounds. I think we need to come up with a simple
form, so that everyone answers the same questions for
each place. There's really no hard/fast deadline, and
ultimately we want to post this on a new website,
that'll be easier to update regularly.Who's in?& What
other data points do we need to collect, other than the
ones I listed above?
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72105209 - Multiples-Specific Park Survey needs your input!"
Email author: nataliasha2004@yahoo.com
--------------------------------------------------------
3. Laudan says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 9:12 pm
I'm more than happy to contribute feedback on the local
playgrounds that we frequent.
Email author: laudanraissi@gmail.com
--------------------------------------------------------
4. Seeking Morning Mother's Helper and Evening Mother's Helper
--------------------------------------------------------
eeewww - 9/6/2012 11:28 am
I am considering my childcare options for when I go
back to work in November. I have a 2.5 year old and 8
week old twins. I currently have a full time nanny that
has been with us since my toddler was 4 months old. My
toddler is in preschool 3 mornings a week.I am
considering getting a live-in nanny who can work
flexible hours (like mornings, preschool pick up, and
evenings to assist with the twins while I put the
toddler to bed). But I am not sure I want someone
living with us.Alternately, I'm considering just
getting supplemental help for mornings and evenings.
The hours would be approximately 7-8 am and 6:30-9
pm.Has anyone hired someone for these types of hours?
What are the rates if they really aren't alone with the
kids?Thanks!
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72093202 - Seeking Morning Mother's Helper and Evening Mother's Helper"
Email author: bugjarbabe@yahoo.com
--------------------------------------------------------
5. 24-Hour Nurse Available Early October
--------------------------------------------------------
eeewww - 9/6/2012 11:15 am
My name is: Elana- My phone number is: 415-601-4405- My
email address is: bugjarbabe@yahoo.com- My caregiver's
name is: Monica Rosa- My caregiver's contact
information is: 646-321-4358- She/he is looking for:
24-hour baby nurse position starting early September- I
employed this caregiver from/to: Started in July and
will employ her into early October- I highly recommend
her/him because: Experienced baby nurse for singletons
and multiples. Also cleans baby stuff and cooks for
family. Great with older siblings too.- Your child's
age: Newborn- Does the caregiver drive (yes/no): No-
Recent Immunizations: yesTentmail me with any
questions.
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72092597 - 24-Hour Nurse Available Early October"
Email author: bugjarbabe@yahoo.com
--------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------
Topic: Tips on Outings with 21-month Old Twins and 1 Care
Giver
Hi all,
Does anyone have tips on taking young twins out alone to the
park, classes...
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72074936 - Tips on Outings with 21-month Old Twins and 1 Care Giver"
6. sfbamob says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 6:07 am
The toddler play area at The Discovery Museum (the area
with the indoor water bed lily pads and mini stream
outside) is very manageable with 2 kids and 1 adult.
Also, try Acrosports (our fav) or MyGym. They have
great indoor programs where kids run, bounce, balance,
etc. At 21 months, you need 1:1 adult:child for
Acrosports.Your nanny may need to see you interacting
with your kids on the playground, etc. so she sees your
comfort level -- and limits. Once she sees that you
are OK with letting the kids run, explore, fall, cry
and get up again -- then she may be less worried.
Also, is she physically up to the task?
--------------------------------------------------------
7. nataliasha2004 says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 5:24 pm
See if you can get your nanny to hang out with other
(more experienced?) nannies... ours loved having
playdates with her local friend nannies, and so did our
kids. (She really only did this with other nannies of
kids about the same age, but there's no shortage at the
average playground.) If you have friends/neighbors
with nannies that you think are doing a good job,
perhaps you can ask them if they'd be comfortable
getting together with yours, to offer a little moral
support/practical guidance?Would she be ok with library
outings? Walking to libraries can also be good, to
burn off some energy before having to be quiet. If
she's got a backpack for their gear, then hopefully she
can just hold both of their hands, or push a
stroller....Also, going to ENCLOSED play areas is
critical to one's peace of mind... I want to build a
multiples-specific layer onto the Playgrounds list that
GGMG put together -- but theirs is a good start (check
out www.ggmg.org).There's been a lot of discussion on
this listserv about recommended playgrounds - try
searching that for some specific suggestions (like the
Presidio Hts playground on Clay between Walnut &
Laurel... that one's GREAT for your age group.
Enclosed, 1 entrance, and play area is way in back,
away from street.) And/or - you might need a new nanny,
if she's really not comfortable. Kids that age have a
LOT of energy they need to get out, or no one's
happy.The Arboretum and Shakespeare Gardens in GGP are
both lovely (the former is huge but completely enclosed
- no cars, no dogs, and lots of cool places to explore.
(She'll probably want to stay away from the ponds and
things -- but there's PLENTY of room away from the
various water features.)Good luck!
Email author: nataliasha2004@yahoo.com
--------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------
Topic: Night nanny questions
We didn't use a night nanny with our first but are
considering it with our twins due in February...
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#72023235 - Night nanny questions"
8. Laudan says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 5:19 pm
Hi there. Congrats on your twins! Based on my
experience:1. Doulas can be certified by a training
organization, although I don't think
training/certification is required to use the title.
I've found that some people use these terms
interchangably and I've often referred to our night
doula, who is certified, as a night nanny or night
nurse.2. It's probably best to line someone up a month
or two in advance. When you are interviewing them, ask
how they typically handle expected start dates.
Different people have different approaches. I wasn't
convinced that we needed night help until after our
twins were born and one was home from the hospital, so
I felt like I was scrambling to find people who were
available. It all turned out well as we found someone
fabulous, but it was stress that could have been
avoided. The team that we worked with was flexible on
start date, since we weren't sure when our second was
going to be discharged from the hospital. I've heard,
however, that some are less flexible and you may have
to start paying around your expected due date even if
you don't need the help. Given the potential for twins
to be early, it's probably more important to make sure
they'll be flexible on the front end, too, and open to
starting a bit earlier if needed.3. I've seen
different approaches to the commitment aspect. Again,
ask how they typically handle it during the interview.
Some have contracts for set period of time that they
want you to sign; others do not. As for extending,
find out whether they already have commitments in the
future that would limit their stay with your family and
communicate during the time that they are working if
you think there's a chance you would want them to work
longer than any initial commitment so they don't take
another job that would start earlier than when you are
ready to let them go. The team we worked with did not
require a written contract with a firm commitment and
we ended up keeping one longer than we originally
anticipated.4. About 4 months or so. We started with
coverage 5 nights a week (split by two different
people) and reduced that to 3 nights over time. That
length of time wasn't really necessary -- we could have
given up the help earlier, but it was such a luxury to
have a few nights of sleep a week!
Email author: laudanraissi@gmail.com
--------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------
Topic: 7 seater cars
saw a mercedes c350 wagon whizzing by the other day with two
seats in the back with...
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#71959253 - 7 seater cars"
9. molly397 says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 3:46 pm
Here's a plug for the Honda Odyssey. We bought a used
2008 Odyssey and love it. We looked at the Toyota
Highlander and Honda Pilot (which are comprable to each
other) but decided that if we were going to go for the
third row, we might as well be able to get in it
without having to jump over the seats (which you'd have
to do if you can't move your second row seats because
of car seats.). Anyway, for whatever reason we decided
against the Pilot and the Highlander. They are almost
the same size (width and length) as the Honda Odyssey
and Toyota Sienna but it seemed to me they have more
legroo & family friendly features. Of course those
features will seem trivial if you hate the idea of a
minivan... We ended up buying a Honda Odyssey because I
preferred the handling and the look&feel of the Honda
over the Sienna. They are comparable on price and
features. I did learn that those two are the only
minivans that have standard 8 seat configurations - a
lot of the other minivans are only 7 seaters. We use
our Honda with a second row with 2 infant car seats and
one car seat for a 5 year old, and it works great. When
we use the third row, we climb in the back, but there
is a way for 1/3rd of the backrow to fold down to make
the climb in easy. Our used purchase was made easy
through Honda's online system of used cars. We ended up
buying in Tracy where there are a lot of used vehicles!
--------------------------------------------------------
10. JessicaNoa says...
--------------------------------------------------------
9/6/2012 10:15 pm
Kia Sedona is the "poor man's" Honda Odyssey, but poor
in brand recognition only. It's the first car I ever
bought that was not a Honda, so I know what I'm talking
about. Same safety ratings and features, same or
better warranty, same mpg, but inexpensive enough that
we could afford a brand new, loaded one. I just wish
it was available as a hybrid.
--------------------------------------------------------
View forum online at: http://www.bigtent.com/group/forum/12135519?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
---------- Advertisement ----------
<a href="http://ad.doubleclick.net/jump/fmpub.bigtent/;groupid=12135499;groupcategory=111;groupcategory=115;sz=728x90;fmzid=4524;dcove=r;ord=1347009356?" target="_blank">
<img src="http://ad.doubleclick.net/ad/fmpub.bigtent/;groupid=12135499;groupcategory=111;groupcategory=115;sz=728x90;fmzid=4524;dcove=r;ord=1347009356?" width="728" height="90" border="0" alt="" /></a>
________________________________________
You received this email because you (house@digitalkingdom.org) are a member of the BigTent group San Francisco Parents of Multiples.
Visit this group on the Web: http://www.bigtent.com/group/sfpom?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
Unsubscribe or leave this group: https://www.bigtent.com/unsubscribe/60778422?key=zBufVxmxyZs%2F7OFXHJJnx8OxWfWRVRRVqGru%2B7x%2FD7A%3D&md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
Terms of Use: https://www.bigtent.com/terms?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
Privacy Policy: https://www.bigtent.com/privacy?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=
Need help? https://www.bigtent.com/help?md=NjA3Nzg0MjI=