San Francisco Parents of Multiples SFPOM General Discussion 1/23/2013 10:15 am - 1/24/2013
1. New Update: Moving one twin to Kaiser (sorry...long!) (zs_mom)
2. The early weeks of breast feeding (juliabarber)
3. Comment: The early weeks of breast feeding (rebeccaadaly)
4. Comment: The early weeks of breast feeding (erin_loback)
5. Dream feed (ked21880)
6. Comment: Dream feed (HollyBuchanan)
7. Comment: Dream feed (mamapod)
8. Comment: Dream feed (noursej)
9. Comment: Dream feed (erin_loback)
10. Comment: Dream feed (twin_boys_on_twinpeaks)
11. Nanny Needed on Fridays (kt2012)
12. FYI: Bumbleride strollers on sale on zulily.com today (noursej)
1. New Update: Moving one twin to Kaiser (sorry...long!)
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zs_mom - 1/24/2013 12:26 am
Sorry it's been so long since I have sent an update,
there has been a lot going on over the last two weeks.
To start, Malia is home!! Yay!! After 37 long days in
the NICU, Sunday we got to bring her home. Of course
it was bittersweet, coming home from the hospital a
family of 4 instead of 5, but a success to celebrate
nonetheless. She's officially 4 lbs. 14 oz, so still
tiny, but growing fast. She is eating really well and
when she's not eating, she's sleeping. Even though we
went past the 2 week deadline that Kaiser had given us,
they still let her stay at UCSF. Thank goodness that
all worked out!Kai has had quite a bit going on in the
last few weeks. He had a 10 day infection that was
treated with several antibiotics, had 2 spinal taps and
several blood cultures to try to find the source of
infection, but nothing was ever found. The doctors
thought there was a possibility of pneumonia or
meningitis, so it was a little scary for a few days,
but the infection seemed to be gone. Once we got over
that hurdle, Kai had a routine eye exam and the
opthamologist had a pretty significant finding. Kai
has a coloboma in both eyes. This is a condition that
can lead to partial or complete blindness, however, she
was fairly confident that Kai's colobomas would not
drastically impair his vision. A coloboma is a hole in
the eye where it did not finish forming and his are in
the back of his eyes. We have always questioned his
right eye because he does not always shut it all the
way and it does not seem to focus in the same way that
his left eye does. This particular finding was most
significant because it lead us to a diagnosis for Kai,
based on all of these individual anomalies. He has
CHARGE syndrome. If you are interested in finding out
more about CHARGE, chargesyndrome.org is a reputable
site that has some very helpful information. Since this
diagnosis, there have been a few more findings that are
of concern. During my pregnancy the doctors were able
to determine that Kai had esophageal atresia and also a
heart defect (double outlet right ventrical), but over
the last 2 weeks they have found several more
complications. In addition to possible loss of vision,
Kai may also have loss of hearing, either partial or
complete. I believe that he is able to hear my voice,
but obviously I do not know that with 100% certainty.
He also has choanal atresia (a narrowing of the nasal
passage that makes it difficult to breathe) as well as
something called tracheomalacia (the wall of his
trachea is floppy and also makes it difficult to
breathe.) So both of these conditions explain why they
have not been able to remove the breathing tube from
Kai and take him off of the ventilator. Because Kai has
so many different issues going on, we meet with teams
of different doctors daily. Everyone at UCSF knows him
well! The neonatology team is in charge of making the
overall plans for Kai and organizing all of his various
services, so right now we meet with a geneticist,
neurosurgeons, ear nose and throat specialists, the
pediatric surgery team as well as the pediatric
cardiologists. As you can imagine, sitting in on a
family meeting with members of any or all of these
teams can feel very intimidating. These men and women
are among the best in their professions and I thank God
that Kai is being cared for by them. Kai's next
surgery was scheduled for Tuesday and it is part 1 of
his 2 part heart surgery (pulmonary artery banding).
Unfortunately on Saturday Kai spiked a fever and was
not digesting his feedings at all. He showed several
signs of infection again. So, he's back on antibiotics
and Tuesday's surgery was postponed. I feel as though
literally during the last 2 weeks, we keep hitting road
block after road block. Everyday is something new.
Monday, on Malia's first day as a "visitor" we found
out that in addition to this infection that Kai is
fighting, he may also have some sort of virus, so Malia
can not sit at his bedside until it is resolved, which
also means that I can not sit at his bedside and nurse
or care for Malia at the same time. Just when I
thought things were going to be a little more simple.
This has all been a lot to take in, for all of us. In
my heart, all I want is for Kai to healthy and happy
and seeing his tiny little body in so much discomfort
at times just kills me. But he is STRONG! All of the
doctors comment on how feisty he is and boy he's got a
firm grip. :) I want to thank all of you for your
tentmails and comments - they have been really
encouraging and have helped to empower me. Also,
thanks to Vicky and the GGMG Member Support for all
they have done for us - cookies on Christmas Eve, set
up dinners to be delivered and even bought a ticket for
my mom to take our 2yo to the Academy of Sciences.
Thanks to all of the individuals who have brought us
meals - it's been amazing to come home to a home cooked
and/or super tasty meal after a full day at the
hospital. GGMG and SFPOM has been an invaluable
support during this very challenging time for us. We
definitely have a very long road ahead, but knowing
that I have the support through this amazing network of
women means the world to me. Can't thank you all
enough!!
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#75636248 - New Update: Moving one twin to Kaiser (sorry...long!)"
Email author: anneshamiyeh@gmail.com
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2. The early weeks of breast feeding
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juliabarber - 1/23/2013 6:12 pm
I've been blessed with two healthy full term twins
(nearly four weeks old today) and am giving all I can
to the effort of feeding them exclusively with breast
milk. All was going outrageously well on a very
consistent 3 hour schedule for the first couple weeks,
then one of the girls stopped gaining weight. After a
few days of feeding on demand to find what pattern
works for the smaller one, I realize that feeding until
they fall off the nipple isn't enough for her, I have
to give her several chances to wake up and nurse again.
Feeds generally take 1.5 hours now, though she gets
mega hungry sometimes and wants to eat for nearly three
hours leaving me exhausted and empty when the time for
the next feed comes around, which is no good for her
sister. My current solution is to have my husband feed
her two big bottles per day, one in the morning, one in
the evening. She always eats like a glutton from the
bottle so I hopefully stave off other monster feeds and
can find time for sleeping and pumping and have enough
milk for her chubby sister. She is gaining weight very
well now I am getting worn out and tired of this
schedule of constant feeding but intend to persevere in
the hopes that they'll start eating faster in a few
weeks. My line of thinking is that if we can make it
through the slow feeding phase without anyone giving up
on my breast and with my supply of milk keeping up with
their demand then we should be fairly well set up for
long term breast feeding. Is there anything else I need
to watch out for?I'd love to hear any advice or success
stories from folks who have managed to breast feed
their twins long term. It's not the end of the world if
we find ourselves supplementing with formula, but I
really want to put any reasonable effort into this to
see what we can accomplish. Thanks!Julia
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#75630383 - The early weeks of breast feeding"
Email author: julia@barber.net
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3. rebeccaadaly says...
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1/23/2013 7:29 pm
Three cheers for bf this long! My twins are 4 months,
exclusively breastfed. Right around 4 weeks it got
purely hellish for us too..it's a major growth spurt.
They cluster feed to gain weight and build your supply.
Rest assured IT WILL END once the spurt is over.I did
basically what you are doing: fed each on demand for a
couple weeks to see where we landed (ended up about
every 1.5-2 hrs in the day and 2-3 hrs at night, for a
short time, then longer stretches at night and 2-2.5
hrs in the day). Feeding on demand like that,
especially during the evening, was exhausting and
worrisome that I wouldn't have enough. I think a couple
nights it was like 5 hrs that one or both were attached
in some way and I was ready to jump out a window. Its
so tough to be exhausted and their demands just keep
coming! Are you able to do tandem? It is much easier
(if "easy" belongs in this situation) to get that going
now. I am not a lactation consultant! But heres what i
did and it worked for me:1. Start taking fenugreek if
you aren't already.2. Drink mothers milk tea.3. Get
comfy, pull up your computer or remote and settle in
for about a week of pure buffet. Sometimes if they are
really screaming and obviously not able to get anything
more from you, of course supplement, but trust that you
do have enough and they are building your supply with
all of this constant feeding.4. Every 45 minutes, get
up and take a break.5. Have faith that you have enough
milk. 6. Stop pumping for a while. My nipples seriously
couldn't take it! I used my stash so someone else could
do one night feeding and I could rest.7. Whenever you
are not feeding, SLEEP.Of course evereyone is
different. Whatever you need to get through it is okay!
Even though breastmilk is best, formula isnt heroin :)
Good luck!
Email author: rebeccaadaly@yahoo.com
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4. erin_loback says...
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1/23/2013 8:56 pm
Congrats on making it so far! I made it 15.5 months
breastfeeding my twins. The above advice is all
excellent and I echo it all. Especially sleeping when
you can. Also, stay really hydrated. The most important
thing, I think, for your own sanity, is tandem feeding.
It's hard in the beginning, but as the babies get a bit
sturdier, it becomes easier. We were always on a
schedule (we were lucky that worked for us), and for
the first month I was pumping after every feeding, and
then after that I pumped after about half of them for
another few months (then I went back to work at 5.5
months and pumped one million times a day... but that's
a different story).Instead of going pure bottle for one
baby at certain feedings, since it's harder to pump a
full bottle than nurse, maybe try tandem feeding both
at the breast to get that double stimulation going and
get them used to eating together, and then top off the
smaller one with a little bottle, just an ounce or two,
afterwards. You could even have your husband or some
other helper do that while you pump. Since you know
she'll drink a lot from the bottle, that gives you the
reassurance that she's getting enough to eat without
having to keep her at the breast for hours. Also,
since it sounds like you have one that is a stronger
nurser than the other, you should make sure you are
alternating them on your breasts.They will speed up.
Every feeding took up about 50 minutes for the first
month at least. You can do it!
Email author: erin_loback@yahoo.com
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5. Dream feed
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ked21880 - 1/23/2013 2:01 pm
Hello twin parents. So need your thoughts on the dream
feed. My twins are 6 months old I am nursing them last
feed of day and morning feed the rest are formula
bottles. The last feed of the day is at 930-10 dream
fees. So I wake them up but the are pretty much asleep
the whole time and Tgey go right back to sleep not
problem and sleep till 630. They are really good
sleepers go to bed 630-7 and then dream feed at 930 and
wake to eat at 630. They have been doing this for
months no problem. My doctor said to stop the 930 last
feed. I haven't done it yet cause I'm loving the hours
they sleep and don't want them to wake up earlier. Also
sometimes their dinner fed us ar 5 or 530 so i know
they cant wait till tge following morning so i like to
fill them up. My milk is super low and may be close to
being done so figured if phase out the last feed. Would
love thoughts and what others experienced.
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#75623728 - Dream feed"
Email author: ked21880@hotmail.com
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6. HollyBuchanan says...
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1/23/2013 2:19 pm
Granted, we had micro-preemies so calories were really
important in their first year, but I know I held on to
the Dream Feed much longer than everyone (including
their Dr.) told me to. I wouldn't change a thing about
it either. It was my most special and peaceful time
with the babies, and I didn't want to give it up. No
one could convince me that there was anything "wrong"
with it, and I knew it was helping them make it through
the night, so I kept doing it. Eventually, I weaned
them slowly by dropping the ounces (we did bottled
breast milk) and then much to my dismay my husband cut
them off cold turkey while I was on a 3-day business
trip! My recollection was that they were about 10-11
months old, corrected age would have been 7-8 months
old. Personally, I say follow your gut - you get to do
that as the Mom!
Email author: h.buch@hotmail.com
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7. mamapod says...
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1/23/2013 2:44 pm
Have you started solids yet? Maybe coordinate it with
that, so you know they are getting a bit more food to
hold them through if you think it is calorie related.We
did bottles during the dream feed, and we weened them
over about two weeks. I think they were about 4 months
old at that point. The bigger one had no problem, and
the smaller one needed the extra feed for a few extra
weeks. But they were also pretty good sleepers. Good
luck!
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8. noursej says...
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1/23/2013 3:05 pm
my twins are 18 months. had nearly identical schedule
as you. my doctor said the same thing, too at about
the same time. my opinion: you don't have to give it
up, or you can and after a couple of (2-3) nights of
cio or modified cio they'll sleep through the night
(though probably only until 5:30 or so; it'll take a
while to build back up to 6:30-7am). i gave up the
dream feed when i was too zonked to do it any longer
(at about 7 months). i was starting to fall asleep
holding them while feeding in the dark in the armchair
in their room. usually, i'd get through the first one,
but start nodding off during the second. i was afraid
i'd drop them. so...out went dream feed. and in came
huge anxiety about cio, which ended up being
ridiculously easy; seriously. i was so tired i slept
through the first night (30mins approx., my husband
told me), then the second night was a very
heartbreaking 15 mins for mama, and then the third
night was about 4 minutes. the end. they've slept
through the night since. i did and do miss those
beautiful quiet nights of holding them and admiring
them while they fed with me in the dark, so peaceful
and beautiful. my little girls are so grown up now...
but, i think i needed that last feed of the day, not
them. they were ready to sleep through the night.
there's a great line in 'bringing up bebe' about the
father saying something like...'i think she thought we
needed her to wake up during the night'... :)your md
is correct, they don't *need* it any longer. but,
you'll be fine whatever you decide to do. :) my latest
favorite phrase is...'they won't be doing ___x___ when
they're 18 years old..." :) everything's a phase.
some of it is harder/easier on us mamas. :)whatever you
decide to do is fine. hope this helps.my best, jen
Email author: noursejlm@gmail.com
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9. erin_loback says...
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1/23/2013 9:19 pm
I definitely agree that if it's something you want to
keep doing, you should do it, and don't worry about
what other people say. However, I just want to offer a
story that may give you hope. I went back to work when
my twins were 5.5 months old. At 5 months, they went to
bed at 7, we did a dream feed at 10:30, and they slept
until 7 or 7:30. I really wanted to be done with the
dream feed before I started working, so I wanted to
start phasing it out around 5 months. We did a bottle
of breastmilk for one (still swaddled, in her bouncy
seat), and I nursed the other (still swaddled). I was
super nervous that they wouldn't be sleeping through
the night once we stopped.Turns out it was a non-issue.
We just didn't do it one night, and they slept until
after 7. Same thing the next night. They were super
hungry in the morning (I think we had a few days where
we couldn't even change their diapers before they ate),
but I guess they just started eating more during the
day to make up for the calories and it wasn't a problem
at all.I've actually encountered this a few times in my
3+ years as a parent -- I was very nervous about a
transition (often coming up with elaborate plans to
deal with them), and the babies/kids handled it like
champs. Dropping the dream feed, quitting swaddles,
converting to toddler beds, quitting pacifiers...Also,
at the end of nursing for me, I was just doing it
morning and night, and then just morning for about a
month. There wasn't a lot of milk left, but there was
some. It's possible to keep nursing with just one feed
a day. I have a friend who did it with her singleton
for months and months.Good luck,ErinBrett and Maggie
9/28/09
Email author: erin_loback@yahoo.com
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10. twin_boys_on_twinpeaks says...
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1/23/2013 10:00 pm
My experience was like Jen and Erin's. my easy mellow
babies just rolled with the punches. With the dream
feed, we always fed at 10pm and I loved it bcs hubby
and I did it together which was always a nice way to
end the day. One night, when the boys were 7.5 months,
6 mo adjusted, we had a sitter and apparently they both
woke up at 7:30 crying so she fed them to our chagrin.
So we "skipped" the dream feed after she left and they
ended up waking up at their usual time the next
morning. So that night, we decided to skip the dream
feed. And they slept thru the night and woke up the
next morning again in fine spirits. And the dream feed
was eliminated. Easy as pie. They adjusted their
caloric intake really quickly and became voracious food
eaters!
Email author: regina_eberhart@yahoo.com
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11. Nanny Needed on Fridays
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kt2012 - 1/23/2013 11:08 am
Hi, we are looking for a nanny to work on Fridays. We
have 13-month-old b/g twins and live near the
Panhandle. Hours can be somewhat flexible, though we'd
prefer at least 6 hours of help. If anyone has a
part-time nanny who is looking to pick up an extra day,
please let me know!
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#75617896 - Nanny Needed on Fridays"
Email author: kikithorpe@gmail.com
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12. FYI: Bumbleride strollers on sale on zulily.com today
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noursej - 1/23/2013 8:10 am
Just saw this on another twin list I subscribe to. I
don't have a zulily account, so haven't confirmed.
Apparently, Bumbleride is being offered at huge
discounts on Zulily today including the Indie Twin in
many colors. I have the Bumbleride Indie Twin and love
it! Can steer it with a thumb and a finger. Great for
both sidewalks and trails. Front wheels option to lock
like a jogger, too. Best, Jen
Send comment to: <sfpom_general@lists.bigtent.com>
With subject line: "Ref#75611965 - FYI: Bumbleride strollers on sale on zulily.com today"
Email author: noursejlm@gmail.com
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